


Everything's Gonna Stay The Same

by AAluminium



Category: Mr. Robot (TV)
Genre: F/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-07-24
Updated: 2016-07-24
Packaged: 2018-07-26 10:24:23
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 780
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/7570549
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/AAluminium/pseuds/AAluminium
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>After a short greeting, Angela suggests visiting me. She’d do it either way, although understanding I’m not in the mood: obviously, wants to help. She always does. But do I need to be helped?.. Anyway, I easily let her in: she deserves to be welcomed for the effort she shouldn’t have made.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Everything's Gonna Stay The Same

She sees me.

Shit. I don’t want to meet her: she’ll ask questions I’m not eager to answer. She doesn’t know anything, and she cares about a whole bunch of things: the hacked prison, Shayla, her own life which suddenly is not number one. Anyway, I don’t discuss what has just happened. Even with myself. I failed, and I cannot correct my mistakes, nothing can be fixed, and the further I go, the better I understand that her death is an inevitable measure. I tried to save her, I truly did – and was not a success. Why am I doing all this stuff? Why the fuck can’t I sit down and stay calm? Why the hell should I be? Why the heck can’t I just change the world – at least my own?..

After a short greeting, Angela suggests visiting me. She’d do it either way, although understanding I’m not in the mood: obviously, wants to help. She always does. But do I need to be helped?.. Anyway, I easily let her in: she deserves to be welcomed for the effort she shouldn’t have made.

“Elliot”, she’s truly relieved. Yet uneasy. “Haven’t seen you in a while”, Angela smiles slightly, as if apologizing for a thing she hasn’t done yet – or for doing too much. She unexpectedly hugs me – tightly enough for such a fragile one; she holds me for a couple of moments – and I suddenly understand that the feeling of her arms doesn’t seem unpleasant. She lets me go. I stare; hurry to close the door behind my guest, casting a quick glance at Shayla’s apartment. Somebody’s moved there recently. I saw a tall guy with a beard but didn’t have enough time to find out who he is. He might be a dealer, too: I smelt weed when walking Flipper. Now it’s quiet; no sound, no scent.

“So… I bought some snacks,” comes her hesitating voice, “Turn on the TV, let’s watch something stupid”.

I do what she wants. Try to start a conversation, ask about Ollie. She responds reluctantly, so I change the subject. Literally – just pull the lighter out of my jeans.

“I did it once,” she whispers, following my actions with a stare. I don’t understand if she’s watching me or trying to concentrate. “Pretty relaxing”.

“Yeah,” I take a drag. I feel my lungs filling with smoke – and eventually I see nothing but haze before my eyes.

“May I?”

I turn to her, surprised. Why does she need it? I’ve recently found things harder – morphine doesn’t help me anymore and weed is just a short-term remedy which doesn’t cure the disease.

“This,” she points to the pot in my fingers. She notices my bruises yet doesn’t say a word about them.

“Ah?.. Okay”.

Her smooth skin slightly grazed against mine. She takes a drag, sniffs.

“Don’t inhale too deep. Feels like crap if it’s your first time”.

She nods. Holds her breath for a couple of moments, closes her eyes.

I know what it feels like: the smoke, flowing through your veins and circulating around your body, bringing pleasant laziness to every single limb. Maybe just an illusion, I don’t care. I truly do not.

Angela’s quiet and calm breathing seems to be the only sound in the room as the TV has switched off for no reason. As if the whole world has ended, vanished and disappeared.

I like her, to be honest. She’s smart, beautiful and reliable, so I don’t understand why she can’t find someone better than the dumbass she’s with. Ollie isn’t only ordinary, he’s primitively obtuse, unfaithful and messy. I know everything about him: the porn sites he visits, those Stella B.’s calls, all his dirty secrets and moreover, he’s not as confident as he wants to seem. Angela’s number one here. He’s an addition – not so good; just a bad code in the perfect system of her life. He cannot be fixed: the algorithms are too old-fashioned.

She turns to me.

“I like you, Elliot,” she says, her eyes penetrating me.

What am I supposed to be doing?.. I’m too high to pull my thoughts together. I do not want to. She kisses me.

I wake up in a couple of hours. Angela’s here, too. She holds me by the arm as if needing protection I can’t give her. I bring danger, not care.

There’s no smoke in the room now. The TV’s blinking without any sound: Flipper has chewed the cords and got the system on the fritz.

“Shit, Flipper,” I try to go of her embrace, “At least you haven’t… fuck. You did.”

The balance has returned to the universe. Everything’s gonna stay the same.


End file.
